Thursday, February 27, 2014

I'm only human.

Sometimes I feel like a hot mess as a blogger. I'm sitting here w. my cup of coffee (which is turning cold quickly) and jumping from FB group to FB group, I'm trying to get my job-job notes done from yesterday and realized I'm behind on another book review. 

My calendar has notes scribbled all over it. I use pen. It just LOOKS nicer. 

Pencil is great and all, but pen, pen makes it permanent. 

Yes. I use a pen and paper calendar. In today's electronic world. Don't be fooled. Many of the bloggers you admire do it. They're kickin' it old school without you even knowing. 

Ssshhh. It's okay. You can do it, too. I won't tell anyone. 

It's interesting that I started this off saying I feel like a hot mess as a blogger. Because sometimes I just feel like a hot mess as a person. Or a mom. Or just me. Andrea. The hot mess. 

I've got girl scout cookie coordinating wrapping up and I'm done. Spent. And have to buy about 500 bags or boxes for myself. Okay, fine, not really, but anyone need some Caramel Delites? Those are Samoas for anyone living outside of my baker's area. I've got 'em. $3.50/box. Gluten free girl scout cookies? Got those, too. Please save me and take them off my hands. Otherwise I'll be eating them all. Dang it. I do mean ALL. $5/bag. Yes, more money. But they're gluten-free. What can ya do, right? 

I need a massage. I almost went for reflexology this past weekend but then I called and the guy said, can you come after four PM? And I was like, yeah, probably not. But I should have. And I didn't. It's okay. I'll take another hot shower. 

And I haven't worked out since I went to karate with my daughter and the Sensei kicked my butt. Seriously. I'm quite possibly STILL sore. I did CRUNCHES, people. It felt awesome. But CRUNCHES. Holy cow. And I had to partner with him. It was kind of awesome, because had I partnered with my 7-yo I probably would have slacked some. 

Seven. She's seven. Holy cow. 

This morning Bruno Mars was making me weepy-ish. I don't know why, he just was. And thankfully Postpartum Progress came to my rescue. (How many times can I possibly type that word and use the "y" key instead of the "u"? Several. Let's leave it at that.) Anyway, the rescue was with a Warrior Mom playlist on Spotify. It's been pretty awesome so far, despite a few weepy lyrics. 

Did I tell you I'm going to see Bruno Mars when he comes to the Triangle? Well, I am. Totally. And that's what made me download his music. It's really good. I bought my ticket after his halftime show. Good stuff. I'm hoping this will be another summer of concerts. I need those nights. They're awesome. 

Okay, I've decided it's my keyboard cover that's giving me problems here. I keep having issues with the letters y and t and the u. So yeah, must be bunching up or something. 

Back to blogging - can you tell this is a total ramble of a post? - anyway, I'm honored and excited to announce that I'm participating in the 2014 Shot@Life Champions Summit. Shot@Life is a program that works hard to spread the word about the importance of protecting the children of the world, ensuring that they're taken care of and given an opportunity for the best possible health. Best possible life. It's pretty awesome. I'm excited and nervous and thinking that, whoa, this is a totally different kind of conference than any I've ever been to and I have to actually dress nicely and professionally and I hope my old work pants still fit. 

But I'm human. If they don't I'll dig up a skirt and some leggings (it's in DC, in March, I'm not expecting true spring just yet) and make an outfit out of it. I can do it. 

I'm pretty inspired by having been accepted to participate in this summit. Quite often I feel as though I'm a baby blogger. Even though I've been blogging since 2009. YES. 2009. My goodness, I'm coming up on my FIFTH anniversary. Whoa. 

But then I realize and recognize that if I don't put myself out there I won't get anywhere. 

And so I apply for campaigns. Some I get. Some I don't. Honestly, most I don't. 

But I continue to put myself out there. I volunteer like CRAZY. 

If I listed the places I volunteer for you'd fall over. Honest. I always have been this way. My life in North Carolina has consisted of volunteer work from pretty much the moment I landed. Actually, before. I swear it. Crazy? Maybe. But true. 

And it is who I am. 

And some days I don't want to get out of bed but I do because I have to get my child up and at 'em and out the door. And so I do. 

But sometimes I want to curl back under the covers when she and my husband leave. But I don't. Or I do. But mostly I don't. I just keep going. 

Maybe I'm not making mega-money by blogging, but maybe that's alright with me. Maybe I find that putting myself out there is enough - sometimes. It's enough for me, for now. I write because I love to write. And writing this, today? It's a reminder. 

For me. And for you. 

That I'm human. You're human. 

That amazing blogger who writes for Babble or BabyCenter or the local newspaper or website and actually gets PAID? She's human, too. 

She might have the mornings where she wants to crawl back into bed. Maybe she doesn't ever wear make-up, either. Or maybe she does because she has to, it is who she is. 

But we're the same. We're people. We do best by supporting one another, but sometimes we don't have it in us as we're struggling to just make it through each day. And that's okay, too. 

Facebook makes that easy, right? A simple like may be taking the place of real communication, but sometimes, on the days we're sitting behind our screens with tears in our eyes, ratty hair and are still in our pajamas as our coffee gets cold (who, me?) we can click that like and remind our friends we're out there. And we support them. 

Even if our words just escape us. Or we've used them all up for the work we've had to do. 

Because, hey, we're only human. 

Don't forget it. 

Now, go reheat that coffee. You've got stuff to do. 


motherhood, anxiety, truth, honesty



26 comments:

  1. Listen. Some of my best friends are hot messes and so am I. I call it "being interesting!" and you call it being "human". We're both right!

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  2. I agree. Being a Hot Mess is way more interesting than being a cold blob.

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  3. Well, first of all Andrea, you are a very good writer. So I think you should look into opportunities to get paid for that. Two things I have in common with you - I also use a paper calendar; and I was once the cookie mom for my daughter's girl scout troop. So I'm completely familiar with the dilemma of leftover cookies. Anyway - I feel your angst! We all feel that way some days. - Pam Houghton

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  4. I'm human... Mother, blogger, student, wife and forget that shit about sahm's having a clean house, cause I can't see my counters. Exercise? Mum yes I have been doing that again, in fact the only time I can read blogs I love now is while on the treadmill, (sorry for any tablet typing on the treadmill typos).

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  5. From one hot mess to another, I love you, girl.

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  6. I have so many drafts like this....rambling is my specialty I think some days! I love that you shared honestly whatever was on your mind and in your heart....and you posted it! Great writing and the guts to share it! So happy to meet you and enjoy you, my new friend! :)

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  7. I get it. I don't get paid for my writing either. I'd like to, of course, but that's not why I blog. And, I totally use a paper calendar!

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  8. What an awesome post Andrea. Made me smile. Made me realize I am not alone. And made me remember that yeah, I am human! Thanks :)

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  9. "Maybe I'm not making mega-money by blogging, but maybe that's alright with me. Maybe I find that putting myself out there is enough - sometimes. It's enough for me, for now. I write because I love to write. And writing this, today? It's a reminder. "

    YES. You are doing stuff-- and getting opportunities. People getting paid gigs? Probably aren't making as much as you think.

    And I always read YOUR stuff. Ahem. :D

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  10. Andrea, welcome to the overwhelmed, too-much-on-our-plate, doing-our-best world of writing and life! I second everything your commenters have said. And I applaud you for dealing with the most important things: your child, your husband, the volunteer causes that are close to your heart. The rest will wait.

    Really.

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  11. We are living parallel lives. I, too, am a hot mess, at least right now. I feel like for the past year or so, I've just been...raggedy...in just about every respect--kind of barely hanging on and only marginally making it all work-ish. I don't even know how to change it. Blergh.

    Congratulations on being invited to the Shot@Life Champions Summit. Awesome!! (I'm not surprised, though. They are damn lucky to have you on board!!) --Lisa


    PS. I, too, have sticky keys. It started with Q (which isn't that bad because you don't use it THAT much, but has progressed to V and worst....R. The R has brought me to near tears. I've tried the canned air to see if it's sandwich crumbs under there but no. I may just have to throw my computer against the wall and see if that works.

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  12. YES. Yes, I am mostly definitely human, and deeply flawed, and a bit of a hot mess myself. But hey, I am not complete crap at everything. Occasionally I can even be awesome. Among the mess, that is - like a beacon of light, pops a spot of awesomeness.

    And BTW, I too have a paper blogging calendar. I got it here and I heart it. But I use pencil, because I am a bit neurotic about my stuff and though pen looks better, when I started crossing stuff out and so forth, it didn't look better at all. So now, pencil it is. Awesome slogan pencils though. The current one says "from Zurich with love" :-)

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  13. HUGS and HEART on this one. First, I love the rambling posts. Your brain and writing is fabulous here. More of these more often! :) Second, congrats on being chosen. xo

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  14. Congrats on the shot@life summit! And I too can be a hot mess behind the keyboard, with cold coffee and paper calendar (yes! Me too!) and all. But you and I - let's just keep putting it out there - shall we? Amazing things come out of that. xo ((HUGS))

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  15. Amen to all of this. Yes to the cold coffee, but I have to admit I recently given up the paper calendar in favor of Google calendar. Never thought that would happen!

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  16. I have to get a new keypad for my iPad. The n doesn't work at all anymore. It's not like I can fake it. I'm working from house and my house is a disaster. I feel like I am barely keeping it together most of the time. It is what it is, I guess. Congrats on the Shot@Life Champions Summit...very cool!

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  17. Stopping by from SITS girl, hope you have a wonderful day. I use pen and paper calendar too as well as Google calendar. And sometimes I want to crawl back into bed, or not get up at all until.. say.. noon. But like you said, we are all humans.

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  18. Visiting from SITS and hope you enjoy your special day! I love your perspective on Facebook "likes"...definitely gave me something to think about! Keep sharing your heart :)

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  19. Hey, coming in from SITS. I love Bruno Mars. He is the greatest. I've seen him in concert!

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  20. Happy SITS Day!

    I know all too well about the Girl Scout Cookie Sale Pressure. Hugh, it is July and I still have three boxes setting on my living room table. I guess I hope someone who stops by will take them (as the others did).

    But, I digress as what I really want to say is that I have learned to just chill out. As a mom, I have no problem stopping to take a nap, staying in bed when I can and serving sandwiches for dinner.

    Shooot, I am human!

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  21. Happy SITS Day!!! A Bruno Mars concert sounds wonderful! I loved his half time show too. I think he is a great performer,he reminds me of some of the greats.

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  22. I haven't been blogging 5 yrs not even a whole year yet. But one thing I 've figured out we're all hot messes but it's why we all pretty much like each other. I was a hot mess way before I started blogging, hell I may have been born one!

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  23. ...I'm just slapping you a virtual high-five simply for admitting that you, too, still write things down the old fashioned way.

    I'm a proud Filofax owner over here. And I will never let it go.

    I welcome critics to flame away...

    Stopping by from SITS

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  24. Hi! Visiting from SITS! Your Girl Scout cookies cost only $3.50!?! We are $4 here in AZ! Love this post :-)

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  25. Hi! Visiting from SITS! Your Girl Scout cookies cost only $3.50!?! We are $4 here in AZ! Love this post :-)

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  26. 1. I'm a hot mess...you know this.
    2. I ramble...you also know this.
    3. Gosh a simple click of the like button for sure can make a difference!
    4. I am almost never dressed...like at all.
    5. I live this post!

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