Friday, August 3, 2012

BAM! Heat In The Kitchen

Batcrap Crazy

Please join me in welcoming my friend Ducky from Batcrap Crazy today.

I'm more than excited that she was open to coming to my 'hood and sharing a little bit of her (hi)story with y'all while I'm keeping busy in NYC at BlogHer this week/weekend!

Once upon a time there was a girl named Ducky ... keep reading ... you'll enjoy, I'm sure of it!

"…mom we did some cool experiments in Science today.

'Glad you had a good day Ducky.'

'I have a paper describing how to do it at home. It was really easy to do at school; do you think I could try it again tonight? (which was a total lie. We DID NOT try the experiment at school. It was dangerous.)

'Sure. After dinner.'

So fast forward through dinner and cleaning up because I’m sure somehow my sisters made sure I was on dish duty that night. Every one was busy elsewhere in the house. Mom set me up with a small sauce pan and the corn starch the experiment required. I was in 6th grade afterall; totally competent to handle myself at the stove.

A little cornstarch in the bottom of the pan…..low heat….it removes the moisture in the starch. I expertly wiggled the pan now and again to prevent burning. That would come later; the burning.

Sufficient time for the moisture to cook away and then I moved to stage two. At the island was three lovely pieces of construction paper laid out awaiting their line. With the deft skill of a lifetime snorter6th grade perfectionist I lined out the cornstarch on center of each piece which was then rolled into straw like tubes.

Step three required a lighter and some blowing power. Step 3 on the worksheet says to be sure that nothing flammable is in your work area and to be sure there is adult supervision. WHATEVER.

So I am standing where the X is (see picture below). I pick up my first rolled tube of moisture free corn starch and instead of blowing I end up sucking. It could happen to anyone so shutyerpiehole. After chugging some Gatorade (the old school kind…you know, the orange powder mix) I pick up my awesome tubular mega straw number 2.
Flick the Bic....

Flame roaring at the end of my fully extended right arm, I take a deep breath before putting my lips to the tube and blow…


Shooting flames come roaring out as the cornstarch meets flame and it is the COOLEST FREAKIN’ THING I’VE EVER SEEN JUST LIKE SPECIAL EFFECT EXPLOSIONS IN THE MOVIES! I’m screaming out of excitement and the smoke alarm is screaming out of fear. My mother rushes in to find her refrigerator torched black.

Remember that little diagram above?

I was standing opposite of the fridge.

It was white.


Now it's black.

Mother sorta freaked out - the wuss. Once all the screeching stopped (including the fire alarm and my sisters) I realized there was still one tube left.

My mother realized she should’ve looked at the experiment paper first.

I totally snuck outside to torch something else while she fretted over how to clean the fridge (turns out it was just damage done).

Remember - check Ducky out by clicking her blog button above or any of the links below and say hey!
Twitter: @batcrapcrazy


  1. Thank you for having me into your space today! I LOVE this story. My childhood was great...although my mom is a drunk now. Heh....

    Just kidding. She isn't. Somehow she survived me and I am reaping that whole "Just wait til you have kids" thing she use to holler at me while chasing me with a wooden spoon. :D

    Hope you're having an amazing time at BlogHer! So jealous

  2. I think my son will try this. Thank you for the warning.


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