And this weekend hubby isn't OOT! Thank goodness.
I hope you're all well and enjoying decent weather. Come tell me about it so I can be jealous. We're getting rain, rain and more rain, and it makes me cranky. And headachey. And emotional. And makes me think a lot, about a lot of things.
Yeah, I know. We all go through those kinds of days. Weeks. Months. G-d hopes not years! I guess that I've just been over-thinking, and thinking, and re-thinking so many things, and it makes my head hurt. And I found myself writing a message to a friend earlier today and there were tears rolling down my face. I don't even know why.
Maybe it was the class I attended this week. Did I mention it was awful? It was awful. Anyway, I've started thinking about how it's been so long since I have contributed to the finances in our household, aside from saving pennies by clipping coupons, and saving pennies and other coins, literally.
And I know, I know that I spend time at home with my daughter, and because of that we don't have to pay for daycare, or preschool, or anyone to watch her. And I know that I also don't drive (yet!) and therefore don't have to concern myself with taking a course and paying for it, extra ga$ money, and whatever else I would need to consider. But this week, after having my lil one have a few play-with-friends moments, I started wondering.
I know most of you know I've been working from home for the past two months, and I am truly enjoying the experience. And I think that I'm doing what is right for me at this time. And yet I still struggle, in my mind, when it comes to finances and what I contribute/don't contribute. Perhaps this is the struggle in the mind of many a stay-at-home-mom. Perhaps not. But I can't imagine that it's just me and my inner turmoil. Others have to have experienced it, as well, right?
And so, I spoke with a woman who was sitting next to me at the horrible course the other day. I mentioned that I am fortunate enough to be able to stay home with my daughter, and she said, you're not fortunate, you made a choice. That has stuck with me. I did make a choice. We made a choice, as a family. And I think that it was the right one for us. It is the right choice. But my daughter won't be three forever. And so then what? Sigh.
I told you I was thinking too much.
And so, I continue to challenge myself with various concepts, ideas, readings and discussions. And sometimes they all happen completely within myself. But as I started to write this post and feel thankful for Friday, with hopes for a nice and relaxing family weekend, well, I guess it all just popped up and out. Go figure.
Thanks for listening. As always, you bloggy peeps rock.