Tuesday, January 1, 2019


goals, plans, shoulds, needs, what you need, what do you want, self-care, self-love, respect, true to yourself
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Happy 2019, y'all!

This isn't a word of the year post.

I've actually come up with a word that I want to represent my mindset and plans for the new year, and that word will come. 

Instead, I want to talk about intentions. 

We all have them.

I'll do that tomorrow.

I'll call her next week.

I'll get back to that text. Soon.

And then.


Time goes on. 

And intentions - as good as they may be - don't turn into actions. 

As a therapist, I am someone who works with people on turning their intentions into actions. 

I'm also someone who advocates to remind people that every intention is not always in their best interest. And so the guilt we feel at the lack of action? It's not always required. 

Listen. I'm a Jewish girl from Brooklyn. I'm pretty sure I've got the guilt thing down. 

But I also know that there are no reasons for SHOULDS. 

There can be so so many intentions. 

But as long as you don't turn them into shoulds? You'll be okay. 

Because your intentions won't turn into actions if they're "I should do this," or "they said (they? who the heck are they, anyway?) I should do that".

They'll only turn into action if you NEED to do these things you're thinking you should do. 

Get it?

This is free therapy here, y'all. 

I teach this to clients at least once a week. 


What you need?

Create your intentions around what you need. 

In your life. 

Your world. 

Your days. 

Your moments. 

What do you need?

Create your intentions around those thoughts. 

And come and talk to me in a few weeks. A few months. 

Heck, let's talk January 1st, 2020 (Oh MAH goodness, TWENTY TWENTY!) and see where you are and where you've come from.


Set yours. 

And dive in. 


  1. Quite a few years ago, Suzie Orman talked about wants and needs on Oprah, and she was referring to money. However, it can be applied to a lot of things in life. I try to weigh things by needs and wants. It's not a perfect concept for everything I do, but it does cover a lot of ground. If nothing else, it can help one to pause and think.


  2. I love how intentions keep us on a path toward our higher self. They give us space to adjust our approach, if how we started isn't getting us to where we want to go. We can show up for our intentions even if we don't have certainty that our next step is one that will work. Kind of like using the North Star to navigate. :)

    I think where I have room for growth is narrowing down my intentions... each day, week, month, and year. Not trying to tackle too many things at once.


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