Monday, May 12, 2014

Motherhood is ...

There are so many words I could fit into this post. The one that has been swirling around my head for days. I have thoughts and feelings and well, it's possible that this post has been swirling around for longer. Maybe years, but more likely many months. Seven, to be exact.

Because seven months ago my family experienced the worst day of all of our lives.

Worst of ever.

And those of you who know me know it's when we lost my father.

And those of you who don't, especially, you know it now.

And that day. Those days. Seven months ago? Those days my mother's world completely changed. Forever.

And my breath caught. Because all I could think of - all those months ago - was getting home to my Momma. My mother. The strongest woman I had ever known.

The woman who beat cancer off with a stick. Or a mask. Or just love. The heart. Her whole heart. She fought it and she won.

The woman whose smile and laugh made my daughter giggle loudly. And still does.

The woman who braved the boat and the lake, despite my dad's concerns, WITHOUT a life jacket on.


And motherhood, well, motherhood is so much.

Motherhood is watching your children grow up and leave the nest, as they say. Watching and knowing that even so, you're forever tethered.

Motherhood is unconditional love, even if you disagree with whatever came before and whatever comes next.

Motherhood is letting your grown daughter say "MO-THER" when she wants your attention.

Motherhood is laughing til you cry together. Or crying until you can find a reason to laugh. A moment. A memory. A word. A picture. Something. Anything.

Sometimes it doesn't matter what it is. It's just there.

Motherhood is holding hands without saying a word.

A knowing look. A small smile.

Motherhood is somehow supporting your children and grandchildren when their own worlds feel shattered, regardless of how much your own heart hurts.

Motherhood, my dear sweet Momma, is you. Everything I know about being a mom I learned from the best. I learned from you. I'm truly blessed for that and can't begin to find enough words to express the way I feel.

I love you. Always and forever. I hope you had a beautiful Mother's Day.


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