Screw You Dove
So I love to yell at the TV. My favorite shows to yell at are on the Food Network, but that’s another post. Today I’m going to yell at the TV about commercials.
** Sidenote, it's Andrea - Huge apologies in advance, I had the videos embedded but they were showing up SO huge that they were throwing off the sync of my blog page so I had to change them to links! Sorry! **
Screw You Dove Chocolate
Who needs daily affirmations from food? Seriously. If I’m the kind of person who needs help with my self esteem I doubt that an “uplifting message” in the wrapper of the chocolate that I’m shoving into my face while crying is going to help. Get a therapist, reading all the wrappers you have laying around you (reminding you of how much you really just ate) will not help.
Screw You Saab
If I had the magic powers of creating miniature live animals, trees, light bulbs and car parts out of paper I would not be designing cars. Especially cars that no one buys. Not to mention this commercial does not tell me why I want a Saab. Is it made of pine cones and moose? If I had those magic powers, I would create the world's largest miniature zoo, I'd start a car parts supply chain and furnish the cheapest light bulbs to all the major big box stores while raking in the cash and living on my own private island. I'd also create a herd of tiny, tiny cows for my own amusement and let them roam my private island. Tiny cows are a big deal to me, but that's also another post.
Screw You Pop Tarts
Screw You Anti-Meth Ads
(And thanks to JP, fiancé and all around awesome dude, for turning me on to the incredible super powers this meth commercial offers.)
***Seriously kids, don’t do the drugs***
Screw You Dove Soap
Who exactly are “THEY”? Why do they think I’m ugly? What did I ever do to them and why does a soap company have to defend me? It’s my giant ears. They found out about my freakishly large ears and now they hate me. They think I’m a pale, short, chubby, ugly girl with over-sized man ears and they’re out to get me.
I need some chocolate.
About the Author:
Rikki is one of the most preeminent authorities on pie living today. To find out more about this incredible author visit www.alwaysroomforpie.blogspot.
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