Friday, April 9, 2010

Guest Post: LabMom

Hi fellow 'Good Girl Gone Redneck' fans! Andrea has given me the great honor of writing a guest post on this fabulous mommy blog and so I thought I would introduce myself first.

I am LabMom, and I blog about mommyhood, science and quilting over at The Toughest Job You'll Ever Love. My blog name and my alias both reflect my career as a full time laboratory scientist and full time mom of two little girls under the age of 5. I am doing my best to balance it all, but that mostly means I have lowered my standards.

Today in the spirit of collaboration, and with the idea that as fellow moms we should always be there to support one another and share the insider secrets to raising happy, healthy children, while keeping ourselves sane, I am going to share with you my top 10 things that I think every mom should stop feeling guilty about.

Things that you would never confess to doing unless someone else admitted them first! So here I go.. I'll fess up, only for you Andrea and your wonderful readers!

LabMom's Top 10 List of Things Moms Should Not Be Ashamed About:

1. It isn't terrible to lie about a toy's dead batteries. If the Laugh and Learn Puppy is driving you absolutely crazy, you should feel no guilt when you tear those suckers right out. Feel free to tell your kids that they died, or even that the toy is permanently broken. There is no shame in this, and your pounding head will thank you.

2. It is okay to lust after children's television characters. The next time you toilet breaks it would be great to have Handy Manny on speed dial while one of the Wiggles gives you a back massage. There is no shame in this fantasy.

3. There is a fine line between motivation and bribery. Don't worry if you occasionally cross it. If the promise of dessert gets the carrots eaten, so be it. As long as the reward you are offering isn't also accompanied by begging and pleading consider it well deserved.

4. Put your kids in clothes that you like while you have the chance. Don't let anyone tell you that pink frilly dresses are 'too girlie' or that your little boy shouldn't wear that 'Dadddy's little tax deduction' tee. If you want to play dress up with your kids while they are little, go for it! Pretty soon they will not let you pick out their clothes and so you may as well enjoy it while it lasts (just be sure to take lots of pictures for blackmail.)

5. It is okay to blame your spouse if your child is dressed like a hobo. Didn't have time to do laundry? You child is running around in a dirty shirt and mis-matched socks? You run into the head of the PTA at the grocery store? Feel free to blame your husband. We all have seen what happens when Dad chooses an outfit, you so may as well let him take one for the team this time, since NOBODY wants to confess that the allowed their child to leave the house dressed like that!

6. Your child will still learn to read even if you don't always read every word in the story. Sometimes you just want to get through the bedtime routine and that may mean skipping words, lines, paragraphs or even whole pages of bedtime stories. You do what you have to do. Eventually your kids will wise up to this scam, but until they do go ahead and fast forward through stories when you are in a time crunch. They won't end up needing remedial reading lessons because of it.

7. You can serve an occasional meal composed exclusively of pop tarts or peanut butter crackers. We all know there are days when you just can't get it together to get a meal on the table that would be considered even moderately healthy or balanced. That is okay. Every once in a while let your kids run roughshod through the pantry and let the cards fall where they may. It isn't going to warp them for life.

8. Take a little extra time whenever you are running errands without your children to do something for youself. Even if it is just spending a couple minutes at the grocery store checkout thumbing through the latest trashy tabloid. Don't feel compelled to rush back home. Free time is hard to come by and you may as well help yourself to some when you get the chance.

9. Don't feel bad if you giggle when you hear a child say words like boob, weenie, balls, vagina, or penis. It is funny to hear those types of terms coming out of the mouths of babes. Yes, we shouldn't encourage them, but we just can't help it.

10. Never wake a sleeping child to A) change them into their pajamas or B) brush their teeth. It isn't worth it. Ever.


There you have it. My top 10. Yes, there are dozens, if not hundreds, of more things we feel guilty about and shouldn't but there just isn't space for them all. Just know you aren't the only one doing them, even if you are the only one to admit to it!

Thanks so much for reading, and thanks again to Andrea for giving me this chance. Please feel free to stop by my blog if you get some free time, I promise I won't giggle if you say "weenie".

4 comments:

Michele said...

OMG!!! Those were great. Headed over to your site right now ;)

Rhaven said...

All true. Thanks for the chuckles Labmom!

ModernMom said...

Solid advice!! Thanks for the giggle:)

nycgirl0501 said...

Great Guest Post!
So nice to find a new blogger friend! Love your sense of humor and how realistic this advice is! :)

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